[QOTW] Quote of the Week, November 20

[Quote of the Week]

Dear QOTWers,
     Tallying up the votes this week I watched as my two favorite quotes
survived each elimination round in the mixed elation that they would both
make top two and sorrow that inevitably one must take the other down. I
watched with breath abated as the last of the other nominees was deleted
and then cautiously prepared to count up the votes. Somewhere out there
the god of humorous high school references must have been smiling on me
because, when I finally mustered up the courage to take the final tally,
it was a tie. I didn't even have to rig the votes. So, before I dig a hole
for myself, let's move on to our winners:
     "They won't discredit us if they think we're socially dysfunctional,
right?" -Nick Pittman, on the evaluators visiting this week, a
Commonwealthian to the bone and
     "You're going to fall in love with someone. They're going to die.
You're going to die. Your kitten's going to die." -Ms. Grant, a
perhaps morbid but always loyal QOTW reader, who votes for herself or her
sons every time one is nominated and then writes an apologetic note
afterwards.
     And before we go on to our nominees, I'd just like to apologize that
due to a shortage of funny there will be no honorable mentions this week.
Instead, everyone should stick around for a special edition
Tech (Quote of the) Week email coming out later this afternoon. (And for
those of you who don't get HMs, when you recieve this email and realize
that the extra dose of hilarity really does make your Sundays better, you
can sign up at honorablementions-subscribe at qotw.net). And now:

"I didn't know what 'republican motherhood' was so I just put down Laura
Bush." -Aaron Stern after a US History quiz

"The Indians were kind of like Ms. Rome: barbarous and violent." -Dylan
(his impression of an embittered student's thesis)

"Isn't it amazing how addition and subtraction still work?" -Jenny (after
the class solved a tough calculus problem up to the simple math)

"And the fat mice nibbled quietly on their cheese..." -Larry, leading/
narrating announcements

"That's because all we read about in Spanish are death and prostitutes."
-Zoe, in response to the claim that everything sounds better in Spanish

"There's a lot in math that's neither right nor wrong; that was just
wrong."  -Mr. Sherry, on a student's proof

"I want to take poverty down. Come over here poverty, I've got candy.
Everyone likes my candy." -Harry

Chris: "These kids were punks."
Jamie: "Were they actually wearing, like, sketchy clothes and stuff?" 
Chris: "They were from Yale."

"You could smother several men with it. It's got parallel smothering
capabilities; like a smothering shift register." - David German,on a
large, red, fuzzy blanket

"The Serbian delegation moves that the Albanian delegation meet for a
private caucus in the hall." -Nathan Kohlenberg


So vote by 5 PM on Friday and remember that the best part of hearing
something funny is sharing it in a mass email with everyone else*.

-Greta "Hershman-Tcherepninson" Friar

*Humorous mass emails should only be sent out by trained professionals. Do
not attempt at home. If you have something funny you would like to put in
a mass email, send it to qotw at qotw.net to be screened by our content
editors, up to one of whom will be waiting for your letter