[QOTW] Quote of the Week, August 15

[Quote of the Week]

Voters:

Last week's long-shot last-second winner was "When I told my parents I had
become a LEEK editor, my mom was more excited about the leek than the
editing. Actually, my mom put the leek in a flower pot to make it grow.
Then my dad put it in my dinner afterwards." -Norris Wong, on receiving a
vegetable leek as a symbol of his being appointed editor of the LEEK,
school humor magazine.

You should know the voting drill by now, but if you don't, there's still
time to learn. Go to www.qotw.net/~qotw/howtovote.html to begin your path
towards redemption.

This week's quotes:

"They say that they play rock and nothing but rock, and I think this song
falls into the category of butt-rock." -Randy, on the classic rock station
playing the Van Halen song "Jump"

"Bah! I dismiss the eighties with a wave of my hand. Well, I'm gonna try.
If we don't try, how can we know what we might do? I strive ever forward,
pushing the limits of what can be dismissed." -Julian Hyde, on whether one
can offhandedly dismiss entire decades

"My main [college essay] was on me and my dad when he had cancer. Then
[the essay for Stanford] was the same one, just talking about a picture of
us during that time. But my best one I wrote in three hours about 4th
grade science." -Matt Kraning, on college essays

"You always see the good in every man and woman and transgendered shift.
You're a good man, Wes Borlin." -Norris Wong, to Ben Orlin, inexplicably
renaming him

"You could get cloning past Congress if you said cloning is like making a
sequel of yourself but then the RIAA and MPAA would be like 'NOO! Cloning
is really like bootlegging yourself' and then they would sue you for
copyright infringement because they had copyrighted you, your soul, and
your little dog too!" -Paul Cavallaro

"Brideshead Revisted isn't a miniseries; it's a way of life." -Dewey Cyr

"Yeah, well our inflated egos are at least TWICE the size of Michigan!"
-Tanner Tillotson, on the fact that Massachusetts is about one fifth the
size of Michigan

"My dad went [to Stanford] for grad school, and told me that one's
ultimate goal as a student is to do a copious amount of work and have
everybody think you don't do any. Whereas at Commonwealth, the goal is to
do no work and have everyone think you do a ton." -Ben Orlin, contrasting
Stanford University and Commonwealth School

"John Kerry is a gigolo-bitch-fag, and you are too; you're a fag, and
you're a fag, and I'm a veteran!" -A veteran, in response to the question,
"Would you like to help defeat George Bush?"

"Why would you want to do that? George Bush is your king! I knew the
terrorists for 35 years, and he saved me!" -An old French woman, in
response to the question, "Would you like to help defeat George Bush?"

Okay, so I broke an age-old QOTW commandment this week by nominating
myself. In general, self-nomination is slimy and despicable. That holds
true here as well. However, I needed a tenth quote, and I figured it was
better to get a little slimy than to let down the voting public.

Voting closes this Friday at 5:00 pm. Next week's email will be delayed a
day or two, but should include a delicious batch of Road Trip quotes from
such wonderful sites as NYC, Philly, D.C., and even that modern-day
paradise, New Jersey. Be sure to sign up for the Honorable Mentions list
(it's a fabulous email one this week) by sending a message to
honorablementions-subscribe at qotw.net.

-Ben "slimy Wes" Orlin