[QOTW] Quote of the Week, August 24

[Quote of the Week]

Voters:

Apologies for the late email. I was on a whirlwind tour of the East Coast,
a tour that spanned eight days, five colleges and universities, nine
states or territories, and more than $6000 in highway tolls.

Last week's winner was "Bah! I dismiss the eighties with a wave of my
hand. Well, I'm gonna try. If we don't try, how can we know what we might
do? I strive ever forward, pushing the limits of what can be dismissed."
-Julian Hyde, on whether one can offhandedly dismiss entire decades.

To vote, simply follow the handy instructions on
www.qotw.net/~qotw/howtovote.html.

This week's quotes:

"Hi guys, I'm Bil. With one L. Don't worry, it can get worse. I have a
brother named Mat with one T." -Bil Zarch, head of a Hebrew School

"There are several, Washington being the largest in population, Wyoming
being the largest in area, and Wisconsin being the largest in cheese and
cranberries." -Ben Miller, explaining the "W" states

"Well, he graduated from MIT. And then he tried to start his own Romanian
nationalist party, but it didn't work out too well. Apparently Romanians
aren't too patriotic." -Masha Schpolberg

"I officially declare this an Awkward Silence. Time to make a disturbance
in the profound yet pregnant pause!" -Andrea Lam

"It raised a lot of interesting questions. Unfortunately, most of them had
to do with plausibility." -Jenn Orlin, on the Tom Cruise film Collateral

"When you get down to the last four or five thousand, they're virtually
identical. I could kill the freshman class and replace them with the
waiting list, and no one would know the difference, except for maybe their
parents." -Yale College admissions officer, on the undergraduate
admissions process

"We read applications for 6 to 8 hours a day. Most of us wear glasses."
-Princeton Admissions officer

"The [Hall Leaders] are well-trained in peer mediation and CPR, so they
can help you if you and your roommate get in a fight, or if your roommate
dies. You know, some people don't get that that's a joke, and I have to be
like, 'You guys, your roommate isn't gonna die.'" -Swarthmore tour guide

"Oh, yuck.  They're just big bags of throw-up." -Noah, age 5, on the New
York Yankees

"We have oatmeal, sausage, cereal, a salad bar, vegetarian options, a lot
of waffle irons, and a woman named Wilma who makes omelets." -Caroline,
Columbia tour guide, on breakfast options at Columbia

Voting closes on Friday afternoon at 5:00. Sign up for Honorable Mentions
by sending an email to honorablementions-subscribe at qotw.net to receive the
sweetest blessings of the afterlife in the comfort of your own home.

-Ben "pizza pizza" Orlin