[QOTW] QotW 4 March 2007

[Quote of the Week]

Dear QotWers,

The act of submitting quotes is not as difficult and precise an art as,
say, rocket science or mixing metaphors. In a nutshell, you must simply
listen to the people around you, note the funny things that they say,
write down said funny things, and then submit the funny things to Quote of
the Week either by using the form on www.qotw.net or by e-mailing them to
qotw at qotw.net . We understand that the elephant in the living room is a
tough cookie to jump, but you must do this for love. The cows won't feed
themselves, you know.

Last week's winner:

'The Persians were considered too civilized. Like, girly men. They wore
pants.' --Mr. Conolly

This week's quotes:


'I think he's dead, but maybe we could send him some flowers or
something.' --Ms. Grant, on Donald Keene, translator

'[Teacher hiring conventions are] the only place where you'll see men
wearing suits and backpacks.' --Ms. Jackman

'If I said boys are sitting on one side of the room, and girls are sitting
on the other, you might know that I'm seperating you because the boys have
cooties.' --Ms. Rome

'If any of you want to adopt a neglected hermit crab, talk to me.' --Ben
Safran

'A few years ago I had the 'flu. It wasn't bad enough that I wouldn't know
if someone were trying to kill me, but it was pretty bad."
--Teacher-applicant

'I want to dress like that woman. Can I apprentice with her?' --Ms.
Jackman, on the teacher-applicant

'Let's get away from this degenerate stuff and talk about the guy in love
with his own statue.' --Mr. Conolly

'One time my brother told me that...if you put dead or dying batteries
under your armpit it would recharge the battery. Is that true?' --Meg
Oliverio, rendering Ms. Jackman speechless

'Okay, so I left my socks downstairs, but I have this.' --Jenny, holding
up an empty film canister

'It is a vicious pit of inhumanity from which only the strong emerge.'
--Danny Moraff, on the chess competition


Vote for your favourite quotes by sending an e-mail to qotw at qotw.net by
5.00p Friday!

--Andrea 'Always take down your Christmas decorations after New Year's or
you might get filleted by a hooker from God' Lam