[QOTW] Quote of the Week, February 27

[Quote of the Week]

Dearest QOTWers,
     Remember me?! No? That's okay, I didn't really think you would.
Perhaps you remember last week's winning quote, which crushed the
competition:

"It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside - like I just swallowed a
hamster."-Garrison Inge

This quote's landslide victory was aided by everyone except for the
hamsters, who consistently voted for Bess. But enough about the fifth food
group; it's time for this week's quotes:

"Last year's half time show was for ages 18 and over; this year's was for
like 50 and over."-Dylan

"I guess women can tolerate pain better. But that's like saying you can
change the oil in your car yourself-you don't want to brag about it,
because people will make you DO it."-a Commie mom, on women in the army

"You're like Mel Gibson without the crazy religious aspect."-Jenny to Pete
Day

"If I bit off my own tongue I'd have two worries: one, that I'd bleed to
death and two, that I wouldn't be able to talk."-Pete

"You know that point in a conversation when it goes from being totally
appropriate to why are you still talking? Every class with him is like
that."-Becca Thal

"I don't want to share my internet with other people! I want an internet
that only I can use!"-Mr. Traub, on the AOL commercials

"Mr. Davis is like the senior that never graduated. He cuts the line, he
beats up the freshmen..he's like 'Hey, move it freshmen!'"-Donna

"Your well-being is eroded in a community with no rules, where you aren't
honored by your children and have to protect your wife from your horny
neighbor."-Mr. Wharton, on the need for the Ten Commandments (especially
"Do not covet thy neighbor's wife.")

"You can buy a vowel."-Ms. Grant, asked if students could buy hints for a
test

"What other information is useful for carbon-dating something? Say you
found my body and you wanted to date it somehow...Oh God, that came out
wrong."-Ms. Jackman

And th-th-that's all for now folks. Remember: voting closes at 5 pm on
Fridays.
Itching for more Commonwealth style hilarity? I thought so:
honorablementions-subscribe at qotw.net

-Greta "I'm not obsessed, I'm focused" Friar