[QOTW] Quote of the Week, August 7

[Quote of the Week]

Fellow QOTWers,
    Here we are again, and the first thing I'd like to say is, it's not my
fault. And I don't mean that to be the opening line of a joke. I'm
serious. No one's been submitting, and I've been up until the late hours
of the night frantically trying to prod people into saying funny things.
The week went like this: on Monday I wasn't too worried, and on Tuesday
only moderately so. After all, I was recieving lots of votes. Surely the
submissions were to follow. On Wednesday the panic started to set in. I
combed my recent message history to see if I'd missed some hilarious gem,
but to no avail. On Thursday I considered, with palpatating heart, sending
out a collection email (quotes of a popular nominee), but on Friday I
decided not to take the easy way out. So, now that it is the weekend, all
I can do is apologize if there is a bit more nonsensical babbling than
usual. I tried my best. And I promise, as detailed in the Quote of the
Week garuntee, that under 34% of this week's quotes are fabricated.
     Moving on, I'm happy to announce that last week's landslide victory
was in favor of the following: "Is 'whigging out' when you panic and join
an eighteenth-century political party? 'Cause I'd pay to see that."
-Joanna Rifkin
     Now for the nominees:

"I spy something...blue."-Emily, on a boat in the middle of the ocean

"He told me I was in his dream and I got really excited. Then he said,
'Yeah, you got hit by a truck.'" -NSHS student

"Can someone put this on a mug for me? 'World's Best Demented
Vengeance-Crazed Morally Ambiguous Antagonist.' Thanks." -Jenny

"Ladies and gentlemen, there is more than one door on this train. In fact
there are 30 of them. Please feel free to use the other 29." -the
conductor

"My verb would have to be shtup." -Mike on the "Verb. It's what you do."
commercials

"This is evil death fog. See that man, walking in the fog? Doesn't he look
evil? He does, I know he does. He's coming to get us." -Dan, on a dark and
stormy night

"You know, I can't really think why teenage SF/F writers are considered
uncomprehendable by the general public. Maybe it's that whole, 'Ohmigod, I
just got a form rejection letter, and it was *personalised*! YES!' thing
that we have going on." -Andrea

"You have to learn from the future." -Josh's Dad, chastizing his brother
for not learning from his mistakes

"So that's why I'm paying 40,000 dollars a year..." -Josh Haselkorn, on
reading about Yale funded research on monkeys trading

"I dunno. When you get to college you'll start saying we're too
materialistic, I promise you." -Roswell's Mom

So remember to vote by 5 PM Friday and please remember to submit. I'm not
going to pressure you into submitting. I just think you should know that
all the cool kids are doing it. Last but not least, sign up for honorable
mentions at honorablementions-subscribe at qotw.net.

-Greta "Bryant Street Theatre" Friar