[QOTW] Quote of the week, October 10, 2004

[Quote of the Week]

Welcome to the Columbus Day Weekend edition of QOTW. Every email is
special here at QOTW and this one is special because tomorrow we will
celebrate Columbus Day. Let's take a moment to appreciate Christopher
Columbus and all the things he has done for us. But while I know that all
God-fearing folk appreciate Columbus,  I expect that some of you
long-haired, freedom-hating hippies will spout all sorts of evil,
communist rhetoric about how he killed all the "Native-Americans" and
enslaved all the ones he didn't kill. So if you must complain please do so
in a funny manner and submit your quote to QOTW through the form at
www.qotw.net .

In QOTW news, last week's winner is Becca Thal with her quote: "Your AIDS
ribbon is drooping; it's like it figured out, 'Oh man, I'm terminal.'"
Congratulations to
Becca on yet another victorious quote.

And now I present to you  this week's nominees:

"When a Northerner wants to sound stupid he uses a southern drawl; when a
Southerner wants to sound stupid he exaggerates his own accent" - George
Dahl

"Single-ply toilet paper in the admissions office: that's how you know
it's a safety school." - Becca's mom

"Yeah, the people in my head hear voices all the time." - Danielle

"We are *all* Mr. Davis' children!" - Garrison

"He enjoys seppuku and long walks on the beach." - Norris, writing a
profile for Garrison on the TIF bandsite (seppuku is ritual Japanese
suicide by self-disembowelment.)

"The 'juniors starting clubs' club is meeting today in the annex" - Ben
Hirsch, after many juniors in a row announced club meetings in the annex
at lunch.

"Where's the firing squad?" - Garrison on all the sophomores lined up
against the wall at snack.

"We won't be able to take the French students to New York to see the art.
And all they have is Paris." - Mrs. Grant on the lack of enthusiasm for
the New York art trip.

"[The investiture conflict and courtly love] are kind of the same things.
In both cases the Catholic Church wanted to have the last say in who gets
to dress and undress whom." - Ben Miller, on the themes of Medieval
history.

"They're together?!?!" - Ms. Jackman, on hearing the names Tammy Faye
Baker and Barbara Streisand mentioned in the same sentence at a GSA
meeting.

Now vote, because in the words of Art Spander, "The great thing about
democracy is that it gives every voter a chance to do something stupid."
And if you don't know how to contribute your own stupidity you can visit
www.qotw.net/~qotw/howtovote.html and
learn how. Voting Closes at 5:00 PM on Friday

For those of you who can't get enough of QOTW, sign up for the Honorable
Mentions by sending an email to honorablementions-subscribe at qotw.net . You
can get twice as much delicious quoty
goodness every week.



Harry "not Kate's brother" Alper

A special thanks to Ben Orlin for showing me the ropes and counting the
votes.