[QOTW] Award Edition [QOTW 4-24-17]

[QOTW]

Hello subscribers to QOTW, thanks you for your consistent submissions 
despite the recent lack of QOTW emails.  To celebrate our loyal 
contributors, this week will be the QOTW awards to our most dedicated 
readers of this mediocre weekly letter.

The QOTW award for the most submissions used goes to Caleb who 
frequently submits half of the quotes used in every email!

The QOTW award for the most consistent voting also goes to Caleb who has 
voted on every single QOTW edition without fail!

The QOTW award for the fastest voting goes to Caleb who has almost 
always voted within 8 minutes of the release date!


The winner of last weeks QOTW was Bryca and Mr. Wharton by a landslide:

Bryca: In Rollerskating we will be discussing snow days.
Mr. Wharton: What snow days?
Bryca: Exactly.
Mr. Wharton: Rollerskating in 3E, for pitchfork distribution.



Now for this weeks quotes:

"Oh no, Jesus keeps getting caught on things!"
-Ms. Haber, trying to pull a sourcebook out of an envelope

"Wait, I just had a complete brain meltdown"
-Mr. Kerner

"Speaking as someone who's had many paperclips in my mouth..."
-Emily Hart

"Dude, I love panda GIFs"
-Tarang

Nina: Somehow we have this ritual of looking up knock-knock jokes...and 
then we cry.
Ms. Watson: Wow...that's not how I expected that to end.

"Your handwriting looks like a cat threw up fish hooks."
-Ms. Haber to a student

Ms. Haber: "We give the Columbians all sorts of deadly diseases, and 
they give us...potatoes."
*pause*
"Which, incidentally, are now giving us diabetes."

Ms. Haber: Scurvy!
Sophia: My guinea pig gets scurvy.
Ms. Haber: Then you are a terrible guinea pig owner.

“They don't got Obamacare for dogs man”
-Tristan

“I mean, look at him. He looks like he robbed one of those kiosks that 
pops up outside North Station and just made off with the merchandise.”
-Dalton, about Charles

Dawson: Taking geometry with Kellyanne Conway would be a nightmare.
Mr. Letarte: No one ever fails my classes, but she probably would.

"Honestly, I'd join the clergy just to wear those clothes. They're 
really badass."
-Johnny

"The sophomore girls are like a living version of BuzzFeed."
-Johnny

Linus: Out, out damn spot!
Emily: Is that from the Cat in the Hat!?

"I ran out of YouTube videos. There just aren't any more."
-Deneb

“I have $45 and a dream. Let's go.”
-Eric

"I'm unflappable. I can't be flapped."
-Bryca

*after taking fire drill attendance*
Ms. Tarnoff: We're all here
Lizzie: Good, none of us died
Ms. Burke: I don't know, your grade is pretty big. We could stand to 
lose a few of you.

Elise: Are you fangirling over Ms. Jackman?
Ms. Haber: Maybe a little bit

"And then they were like...[extremely loud snort] Spanish!"
-Emma Daly on the Spanish American War

"Uh...do you know where we're supposed to put our Spanish kids?"
-Duncan

Mr. Kerner: Anyone listen to Wagner?
Reid: It's my study jam

Ellie: She was going to pay me to talk like a valley girl all of English 
class.
Mr. Kerner: As a Californian, I find that deeply offensive.

"I can't eat chili without dumping it on my pants"
-Jordan

"Does anyone know the etymology of the term 'dead ass'?"
-Dalton

"Food is better than drugs. Except some drugs."
-Jordan

"I got a grant!"
-Ms. Grant

"I was going to bring it in, but then I ate it. It was pretty good."
-Mr. Kerner on a symbolic apple

"The secret to keeping the faculty happy is good snacks"
-Mr. Wharton

"Don't get me started, but I'm starting"
-Mr. Wharton

"First off, 'crew team' is a redundancy"
-Mr. Wharton

"All you relativists!"
-Mr. Wharton

"That's interesting. I wonder if I live in a fake town."
-Mr. Barsi

"Stop touching each other! I don't teach kindergarten!"
-Anna Moss

"Lawn politics are actually very interesting"
-Anna Moss

"I just went to the printer and instead of finding my lecture notes, I 
found a guide on how to fix the printer"
-Mr. Letarte

"United Airlines is a drag"
-Reid

Nicole: Entertain the idea that words are inessential!
Halima: then why are you still talking?!

Reid (to Sid): You just got roasted like your house.



Thank you all for your submissions and please remember to vote for your 
favourite!

-Deneb “Nika wants qotw now so I’m not going to think of a nick name”