[QOTW] Quote of the Week, January 30, 2005

[Quote of the Week]

Voters:

Quote of the Week headquarters, like most of the Northeast, was buried
this week under several feet of snow.  Unlike most of the Northeast,
however, "QOTW headquarters" is not so much an actual location as
something I made up so QOTW would sound more like a legitimate enterprise
and less like me sitting at my computer laughing at Ben Miller's puns. 
Nevertheless, QOTW rises from the wintry chaos of Snowpocalypse '05 to
give you a new batch of quotes, including some delicious Honorable
Mentions (sign up for the HM email by sending a message to
honorablementions-subscribe at qotw.net).

Last week's winner was... me.  "You know how you go into exams with 8
pencils and you come out and they're all dull? The same thing happens to
your brain! You go in with a sharp wit and when you come out you're all
stub." -Ben Orlin

To vote on this week's nominees, just follow the convenient and delightful
procedures described at http://www.qotw.net/~qotw/howtovote.html.  And
fear not: QOTW's brand of democracy is quite different from Iraq's, in
that voter survival rate is well over 85%; and different from America's,
in that no QOTW ballot ever has or ever will include Ralph Nader.

This week's nominees:

"When I was little I thought James Earl Jones was the guy who shot Martin
Luther King, and I couldn't figure out why they gave him so much
television time." -Becca Thal

"'Am' se acuesta solo con 'I', pero 'are' se acuesta con cualquier."
-Carmen Sanchez, ESL teacher, on conjugating the verb "to be"
(Translation: "'Am' goes to bed only with 'I', but 'are' goes to bed with
anybody.")

"You can't spell 'playoffs' without 'layoffs.'" -Paul Cavallaro,
basketball team captain

"Josh and Emily's relationship works like this: Emily says, 'Josh, come
here, I dropped my Kleenex!'  Josh runs to pick it up.  Emily says, 'Ew, I
don't want THAT, it was on the floor!'" -Reilly Grant

"I'm about to leave to cross-country ski to the movie store." -Kate Alper,
on recent snow accumulation

"Man... sometimes I wonder how Commonwealth collectively deals with the
fact that we all have friends who give advice like, 'You should do it. 
Because it would make me laugh.'" -Joanna Rifkin

"I've never wanted to commit theft so much, and so repeatedly, in my
life." -Alex George, on visiting a science fiction museum

"We just need people to play normal high school students.  I know it's a
bit of a stretch for you..." -Alex Logan, asking Masha Shpolberg to be an
extra in a music video

"Too bad I can't scold it by shaking my finger at it, because that finger
is my scolding finger." -Johan Jaenisch, on how to punish a misbehaving
(i.e., sprained) finger of his

Voting closes at 5:00 pm on Friday, so vote early.

-Ben "stub" Orlin