[QOTW] Quote of the Week, January 2

[Quote of the Week]

Voters:

Welcome to 2005.  Quote of the Week is back and, in the words of the
immortal Matt Kraning, "better tha never."  Last week's Quote of the Year
preliminary round extravaganza produced four winners: Mr. Riahi, MBTA
Conductor, Becca Thal's mom, and Julian Hyde.  These chosen four will
advance to the Quote of the Year finals in June.

A warning: this week's batch of quotes is rated PG-13 for obscenity,
sexual content, epic battle scenes, and repeated references to the college
application process.  Younger audiences should avert their eyes, easily
frightened audiences should grab a teddy bear, and prudish audiences
should file their complaints with Jerry Falwell.

To vote, follow the instructions at
http://www.qotw.net/~qotw/howtovote.html.

This week's nominees:

"It's because of the baby boom, a generation that should have been
sterilized, and they weren't, and now they've littered the applicant pool.
 If I sound a little bitter it's because it's that time of year." -Mr.
Whelan, on college application numbers being particularly high this year

"Cyclists don't like hairy people.  You're supposed to be fleshy and
aerodynamic." -Roswell Thomas, cyclist

"I'm not a 'musicals' gay man, I'm an 'Oooh! Fashion and shopping and
penises!' gay man." -Ben Copans

"Listen to me.  THINK FOR YOURSELF." -Poulod

"I would like to go to Swarthmore because there are very few words that
have four consonants in a row, so if you can pronounce the word Swarthmore
correctly you become part of an elite I feel I belong in." -Madame
Folkman, suggesting ideas for a student's "Why I want to go to Swarthmore"
essay

"He became obsessed with Venus fly-traps, so finally one day I got him
one.  He called it Machiavelli.  Then, while he was in Italy, Machiavelli
died." -Anna Ausubel

"Everybody seems to cringe when we mention that Tanner sings." -Norris
Wong, on his band

"See, the world really isn't full of love.  Think about Saddam
Hussein--nobody loves Saddam Hussein.  And since Saddam Hussein doesn't
have a wife, he doesn't love anyone either." -Joshua, age 7

"I'm ready to like math.  I'm extending the olive branch, but math is just
like, 'Fuck you, you never learned to factor!'" -Becca Thal

"I would like to go to UChicago because, when you think about the 'CORE'
program, core rhymes with more words than just about any word I can think
of... words, as it were, galore." -Madame Folkman, suggesting ideas for a
student's "Why I want to go to UChicago" essay

Voting closes at 5:00 on Friday.  And if you enjoyed those quotes, be sure
to send an email to honorablementions-subscribe at qotw.net to enroll
yourself in QOTW's accelerated Honorable Mentions program for the gifted.

-Ben "tossing out the QOTW rule book, but just for today" Orlin