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<p>Hello, dearest subscribers. Apologies for last week's lapse in service -- my only excuse it that it was <br />tech week, and I was consequently too brain-dead to submit funny things. I think we should be back on a <br />regular schedule from here on.<br /><br /><br />Last week's winner was Caleb W., with this worrisome yet friendly observation:<br />"I've been thinking about this. Like, if you die, it's better to have the whole world die with you. It's <br />more community oriented."<br /><br /><br />This week's choices, featuring a surplus of humorous Haber hilarity:<br /><br />"This is so nice -- I'd much rather have life than death!"<br />- Mr. Limperis, on his 7th period class' energy, compared that of the previous one<br /><br />"Water droplets bead up on surfaces because they have the lowest surface area, so they don't have to <br />touch the things they don't like."<br />"Which is why armadillos roll into balls, so they don't have to touch things they don't like!"<br />"Which is why when a truck hits them armadillos roll into a ball so that the least amount of them dies."<br />- Ben K., Gabriel S., and Ben again, reviewing for a chem test<br /><br />"At my old house there were these windows and when I got angry I would bite the sills. And they tasted good!"<br />- Eloise<br /><br />"The ideal flapper body type is Asa."<br />- Ms. Haber, explaining the 1920s shift toward a skinny and androgynous image of the perfect woman<br /><br />"You wouldn't think multiplication was such a high risk job, but a lot of people died of multiplication <br />back then."<br />- Mr. Sherry<br /><br />"He's the black Wilson with the funny hat!"<br />- Ms. Haber on Marcus Garvey<br /><br />"And then he jumped over a wall and he started swinging a sword around and killing people and it was <br />AWESOME. I wasn't there, but..."<br />- Julia, describing Alexander the Great in battle<br /><br />"Guys like Matt are the reason I'm straight."<br />- Kailash (context unknown, and believe me, I'm curious...)<br /><br />"You know that look that models get where they look like they've been hit in the head with an anvil?"<br />- Ms. Haber<br /><br /><br />Please do vote! Simply reply to this email, listing your top however-many-you-like choices. Further <br />instructions are available at http://www.qotw.net/voting.php<br /><br />Also, please do remember to submit! It's very easy (http://www.qotw.net/submit.php), and it makes this <br />whole thing run much, much more smoothly.<br /><br />If you've not yet signed up for the Honorable Mentions emails, which are sent out whenever a good number of <br />excess submissions build up, consider doing so. Just send an email to honorablementions-subscribe@qotw.net.<br /><br />Enjoy, vote, and (please, please, please) submit --<br />Asa "I can't dance" Goodwillie</p>
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